


Breaking Free

by BlackIris



Category: Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Norse Religion & Lore, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood, Blood and Violence, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Jotunn Loki (Marvel), Jotunn | Frost Giant, Magic, Serious Injuries, Swearing, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2019-05-08 15:53:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14697435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackIris/pseuds/BlackIris
Summary: Loki and Yen are needed to aid Thor in battle due to their specialized powers... Powers that are still developing and are yet to be fully known, that is, until one of them gets pushed too far.





	Breaking Free

**Author's Note:**

> Dialogue Prompt of: “You know, I kind of hate it when you spoil me.”  
> This is for @caplansteverogers ‘s 4k Writing Challenge ! Congrats again darling! ❤ Tried something new here, I hope you enjoy - also sorry for the feels, kinda.

“There you are, darling.” Loki says, dropping himself gracelessly to the ground next to Yen, slouching further down behind the fallen tree to conceal himself.

“Yeah. Some party, huh? Remind me why we agreed to help your brother.” Yen says trying to catch her breath.

They sit, panting, trying to rest, regroup, and focus before the next wave comes at them. Yen loses focus as the blood rushing in her ears becomes the only thing she can feel.  Loki sits next to her, gripping his ribs and upper arm, silently thanking the Norns for his abilities and glamor to hide the injuries he sustained while protecting Yen and her location. Only a few dozen or so of these otherworldly beings, their adversaries in this poorly put together battle remain in the area. With their defeat or surrender, Loki and Yen can then find Thor and the others and truly finish this; the end is nearly in sight.

“Shit. There’s twelve more coming to the left.” Yen says, still breathless, as she moves her neck back and forth to try and ease the tension building there.

“I think you can handle it, darling. I know how you like to show off; prove the rest of us nigh irrelevant.”

“What? You’re really just going to sit there?” She asks, arching a brow. “This would go faster if you’d help, I’m sure there’s more on their way.”

Loki smirks, hiding his pain, “Consider it a gift.”

 ** **“You know, I kind of hate it when you dote me.”****  Yen deadpans. 

“Bring your calm to this field of destruction, darling, like only you can.”

She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, quickly calming her fraying nerves and focuses on the rhythmic thumping of feet drawing closer to their position. Drawing herself up to her full height, Yen brings her hands up in front of her, a snarl of concentration takes over her face, revealing the darkness within her.  Her brown eyes flick to a bright blue, looking like smooth orbs of sapphire in her skull. Waves of blue energy roll off of her, making Loki shudder as some of the smaller ones come in contact with him.  Most of her energy radiates out of her palms, sending the squad of enemy troops flying in all directions. In distress they scream: some being flung into nearby trees, some high into the air to plummet to their deaths, others are thrown directly into the ground never to rise again. 

“You are rather powerful, my love. I told you, you could handle yourself.” Loki coughs, beneath her. His hand going to her calf; his touch barely registering with her. “Darling come sit with me, while we have a moment.”

“Loki, what are you talking about? Surely this battle is nearly finished.”

Loki shakes his head, scrunching his face in concentration. “Don’t make me beg.”

Yen sits next to him, scooting closer as he beckons her with his hand.

“In another universe, I’d be able to save you.” His hand cups her face, his eyes peering into her very soul, pain written across his features.

“You think you haven’t? With all you’ve done.”

“I’ve done…”   _ _Terrible things, things not worthy of you.__  “...Nothing.”

Yen inhales sharply, trying to decipher the extent of his wounds though his thickly veiled glamor doesn’t allow for it. She knows there must be severe injuries about him to cause him to speak like this. What she doesn’t, can’t, see she knows is there.

“You’re injured. Why didn’t you say anything?”

Loki remains silent for a moment, opting to give her one last bright smile. “If you knew of the blood on my hands. Of the lives I’ve taken, to keep you from harm –” 

He wheezes, bringing his hand back to his side, in an attempt to sooth that which can’t be soothed.

“Drop this. Stop the illusion!” She shouts, panic shaking its way through her limbs.

“I –”

“Let me help you.” She pleads, resting her hand lightly over his that’s held tightly to his ribs.

He winces at her touch, trying to sit up but failing when the pain becomes too great.

“Perhaps if the stars align.” He pauses taking in a deep breath cut short by his injuries. “Perhaps in the darkness, we could, we could…”

“Loki, please, save your strength.”

“I assure you, in this state, you will see my true form…”

“What?”

“One, ah, I can no longer contain.”

 _ _Is it that bad__ , Yen wonders to herself.  _ _Is it that bad that he can’t hold an illusion?__  “Loki?”

“Yen…”

Loki’s breathes become shallow, his color paling. Fear rocks through her, sinking into her very bones.

“Loki. Let me help.” Yen pleads again. Her voice wavering in his ears as his vision starts to blur and darken. 

He mumbles something Yen can’t hear fully. His glamor falling from him as his eyes flicker shut. Ridges and lines form across his flesh as it turns from a pale cream to bright blue. Yen gasps as she takes in his Jotun form, one that is known, but few have beheld with their own eyes.

The moment of awed shock swiftly flees as she takes in the extent of his injuries that are now fully revealed to her.  Scars liter his hands and face, ranging from jagged cuts and burns to needle point punctures around his lips. Fresh cuts run along his cheek bone, forehead, and hands, steeped in blood, surely to add to his already large collection of scars. A large gash rips through his leather armor and into the flesh along his ribs, the area deeply discolored with his dark blood.  His arm sports a stab wound, that when she checks, luckily, doesn’t go all the way through. 

She hovers a hand over his side, stilling her mind, focusing her powers to press on the wound. In a way she never has before, lighter than she thought possible – more focused and stronger than ever. As her blue energy pushes down into his bloody flesh cracked bones mend and his skin begins to stitch itself back together. Once the wound is mostly healed, she moves to dress his arm. Her seiðr weakened, she rips her sleeve from her tunic, pulling the material down from under her armor, wrapping it around his arm tight enough to stop the bleeding.

“Loki. Loki?” Yen calls his name as he stirs, eyes still shut tight in pain. “Please. It’ll be okay. I’m here. I’m here. Save your strength. Try not to move. Stay with me, Loki, please. Stay with me!” She sobs as his head lulls to the side. She shakes too much to tell if his chest is rising and falling with life. Her fingers go to his neck, searching for his pulse, finding it weak but there.

“Why did we have to help Thor with this?” She asks, brushing his hair out of his face. “If your stupid brother dies before I can give him a piece of my mind and magic – I will personally travel to Hel, Valhalla, to any unknown parts of the Universe to find his sorry ass… I can’t… I can’t lose you.”

The familiar thumping of feet draws Yen’s attention from the leather clad, ashy blue body she’s hovering over.

More creatures, looking similar to the ones they’d been fighting the past few weeks, swarm around her. They shout in their guttural tongue a command she neither hears nor cares to follow.  Her lack of response is met by the raising of weapons.

One of the taller creatures steps forward, threating her in broken Allspeak, shattering her last nerve. “Low she-god.” He chuckles. “Where strength is now? Dead as you soon to join him.”

Yen’s vision blurs with rage. Her hands hum and vibrate with her now chaotic energy. She screams throwing her head back, arms coming straight out to her sides. Her palms turn up towards the sky as her hands turn a deep navy as a violent pulse of blue magic explode from her, radiating out like a bursting sun. 

The ground shakes with a violent, irregular cadence of aftershocks as Yen comes back to her senses. Looking around her, the ground is clear of all debris for several metres, her enemies flung lifelessly far and wide.

A soft murmur draws her attention back to Loki. Clutching at his hand, she looks down to see his blue color a more vibrant hue than before, his breath still shallow. It’s then that she takes in the colorings of her own hands. What once was tanned olive is now a deep blue. Starting at her finger tips it continues up to her elbow where it flecks and fades back to her natural coloring, looking like painted gloves of a starless midnight sky. 

Her breathes come in short succession, panic and confusion threaten to over take her. Her eyes slam shut, stars collapse behind her lids as hot tears burn down her cheeks.

She pulls Loki to her, the best she can without shifting him too much. Her fingers dig into the leather of his armor as her hands shake.

“Heimdall!” She screams to the sky with a sob. “Heimdall!”

She hunches over his form, holding him close to her as lights ignite around her. They are taken by the Bifrost to Asgard as darkness fills her senses. 

\-----

Screams and cries echo in her head. The smell of burnt earth, torn flesh, and dried blood invade her nostrils. 

Pain. Panic. Pity.

And something new. An unknown strength pulses through her; rage and anger, churning deep within her, like the slow tilt and whirl of space.  

Voices float around her. Ones softer than she’s heard in weeks.

Heaving in a large breath, Yen wakes up to silence in one of the healing rooms.

A deep rumble comes from beside her, “Hello.”

 _ _Thor.__  Question after question flickers through Yen’s mind as she takes in his calm smile and caring eyes.

A deep chuckle rumbles through him, “Easy. Easy now, my dear, Yen.”

“What?”

“You have fought well.”

Yen’s narrow at him, pinning a silent question to him.

Thor’s smile widens, “And Loki is alive thanks to you.”

“He is? Where is he?”

“In a room very much like this.” Thor says, motioning to the creams and soft umbers of the walls and tapestries, flickering in the low golden afternoon light. “He is resting, I assure you.”

“But why are you here? He is your kin.” Yen grunts in an attempt to pull herself to sit upright. Thor quickly moves to her side, easily picking her up, adjusting her in the soft cushions of the bedding.  “Why are you not at battle… or off celebrating?”

“The healers told me you had become restless. I had hoped that meant you’d awaken soon. You’ve been asleep for many days.” Thor laughs a little, “The battle was over with your display of power. The ground shook with such force, many thought it was Eldgjá‘s second coming. Besides, the celebration will last weeks. And I will not join it truly until you and my brother are able to as well.”

Yen’s eyes drop from Thor’s happy face to her bandaged hands and arms. Her eyes grow round, swallowing hard, she asks turning her arms slowly, “And what of these? What did the healers tell you?”

“They had not seen anything like it. Not in an age.” Thor offers Yen a supportive nod. “Do you… Remember anything?”

“I remember enough.”

“Perhaps, my brother will be able to shed some light on it.”

“When can I see him?”

“When he is awake. I’m sure he’d like to see you. Thank you in person, he owes you his life.”

“He owes me nothing.” Yen sighs, turning her head as tears threaten to burst from her eyes.

Thor clears his throat, trying to break the tension that now lies between them. “I will let you rest. Just know I will forever be grateful to you.”

With Thor’s departure, the tears begin to flow freely down Yen’s face and her calm returns.  _ _Loki lives.__  She pats at her face with the back of her wrapped hands, drying her face with, to her surprise, no pain from her hands.

Looking around the room one last time, Yen bites the edge of her bandages that lies near her bicep. Tearing and pulling, she’s determined to see what the healers have hidden from her. To see what remains of her hands.

Grunting and muttering to herself, she tugs and tugs. Finally freeing enough of the strips of cloth to pull it free of one arm. The midnight inky blue coloring still remains. With her free arm she easily tears the second bandage off revealing the same coloration. Calm confusion washes over Yen as she takes in the sight of her arms. Her skin feels and pulls the same as it always has as she flexes and moves her fingers and wrists, stretching, rotating them, freeing them of their stiffness from lack of use.

A gentle hum breaks her focus, drawing her eyes up towards the door way.

Loki, looking as he always does, bows his head slightly, “It’s good to see you finally awake. I will admit this to no one else, but I was being to grow concerned.”

Yen pulls her arms under the sheets, an action she feels to be childish but necessary. Hurt spirals through his body, showing only in his emerald eyes.

Loki looks away from Yen, eyeing the wall, “Would you hide from me?”

“Loki. I would never.” Yen whispers, “I just don’t know what’s going on.”

His brows knit together and he takes a cautious set toward Yen, worry and concealed anger coursing through him, “Has no one told you?”

“I’ve only just seen Thor. And he implied that…”

“What? What did he do this time?” Loki spits, rage bubbling to the surface.

“He – I thought you died. He said you were well, that I could see you when you woke.”

Loki huffs, hands wringing together. “But he said nothing else?”

“Only that you were resting. Healing.”

“Perhaps I’ve had too much influence on him.” Loki takes a seat where Thor once sat, pulling the chair nearer to the bed, and continues. “I awoke days ago, having never thought to do so again.”

Yen remains silent, urging him to continue.

“My seiðr was all but spent, my body broken. I, I should have died out there, I would have – had it not been for you. Whatever you did was a great show of power – enough to rival that of Thor, myself, even father. I already owe you so much, and now –”

“You owe me nothing.” Yen says quietly, sternly. “I told you before. You will never be in my debt.”

Loki leans forward on his elbow, staring down before looking back up to Yen. “How can you remain full of such light around me when I am full of such darkness?”

“You may hide in your darkness, but I can no long conceal mine. I feel it is too strong now, different even.” Yen says, her eyes downcast toward her hidden arms.

“Do you remember anything?”

“I remember pieces. I remember battle. I remember your injuries. I remember pain – a maelstrom of fear and rage and...”  _ _Love…__  “I remember seeing my hands… I don’t remember anything after calling for Heimdall.”

“My darling, Yen.” Loki starts, looking her deep in the eyes. “I’ve always known you to be so strong. Stronger than you yourself even thought possible. Stronger than father had predicted in all his wisdom. I’m told you healed me out there. And judging by the state of my worn garb… I think you did more than just that.”

Loki drops his gaze and shifts closer to Yen. “Thank you, my darling.”

“Loki.” Yen says, bowing her head, her voice going low. “I would sacrifice anything for you.”

Loki reaches for her but stops short, one last shred of propriety halting him.  Shame and pride eb through her. She slowly moves her arms out from under the sheet. Closing her eyes as she reveals them to him. “I still don’t know what to think of this.”

Loki’s silence concerns her, weighs down on her. “What the healers said is true…”

Yen opens her eyes to find Loki nearly touching her hand.

“It is considered an anomaly to have such power that it – alters – its host in such a way. You have proved my theory right in such a dynamic way. The realms will tell of your strength for ages.”

“This is good? It looks as if I’m cursed or dying.”

“Yen, perhaps I can persuade you to think otherwise.” Loki fiddles with the hem of his shirt, implying his once injury. “May I?”

Yen’s jaw clenches but she nods her agreement. Flashes of his blood and pain rip through her mind as he lifts his tunic and reveals healed skin and muscle.  Except its different. It’s not tinged pink with new life as it does when the healers mend flesh and bone. He lifts the fabric more revealing a patch of deep blue flesh surrounded by his natural pale cream-colored flesh.

Yen stares at Loki, at the midnight blue that matches her arms.  “How is that possible?”

Loki shakes his head lightly. “As I’ve said, you healed me, but you did more than that.”

He closes his eyes, willing his body to shift to his Jotun form.  Ridges and lines coat his bright blue skin, but the darkened blue patch remains unchanged.

His ruby eyes open and lock on hers and find no trace of fear or disgust.  He drops his tunic and offers her his hand, the one she held, clung to on the battle field.  Its coloration matches the deepen blue flesh, out lining where her smaller hands wrapped around his.

“Does it hurt?”

“No, my darling, not at all.” Loki shakes his head and smiles, as his Jotun form fades from him. His hand still out stretched fades back to the pale cream, her hand prints fading to a soft blue like starlight. “In fact, when we finally arrived in Asgard, I am told no one saw my true form as you just did. You replenished more than my flesh and blood.”

“But you’re alright?”

Loki nods, taking Yen’s hand in his. “As are you, my love. There is no need to be ashamed of these.” He brings her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to the back of it. “Nor your power.”

“Are you not ashamed of yours? You keep it hidden so well.”

Loki chuckles. “While I openly enjoy my darkness, this simply is the form I’m most comfortable in.”

“Your darkness?” Yen smiles for the first time since she can remember. “I’ve always enjoyed it.”  

“Perhaps you’ve embraced yours then, darling. And if you like.” He flicks his wrist overs hers, his seiðr twirling around her skin in green wisps, altering the navy blue back to her natural tanned olive. “I can show you how to do this. Though, I imagine a small trick like this wouldn’t be a problem for a sorceress like yourself.”

“Loki,” Yen gasps, “No. After what you showed me. I can’t.”

Hurt flickers across Loki’s face, followed promptly by calm indifference. He flicks his wrist again and the illusion fades. “No matter. Be as you wish.”

“No. I will wear this with pride.” Yen squeezes his hand in hers. “Without it, I wouldn’t have, I couldn’t have saved you.”

“Yen, I can’t possibly mean that much to you.” Loki’s words fall out of his mouth from habit, regardless of how his fondness and use of endearments with her has grown over the years.

“Had you not been saved… My world would be one without light. All the stars would be dark to me, their beauty utterly lost and unneeded.”

“I’ve been so foolish, all these years. Haven’t I?” Loki grazes Yen’s cheek with the tips of his fingers. “All this time, I’ve focused on your light, your calm. Never thinking I could be worthy of you, of more than you’ve already given me. I never thought I could mean anything more to you. You have enchanted me, held me bewitched for so long. And to think – tell me I’m not wrong about this?”

Yen smiles. “I’ve only learned to love chasing after danger and death because of you. You make my heart race, make me feel more alive than worlds colliding, and stars aligning.  You’re more than my prince, always have been.”

Loki takes Yen’s hands in his, his thumbs rubbing circles on the back of her hands. “Yen. Be mine for all the realms to see.”

“Loki –”

“Let me court you. Let me wed you. Let me love you.”

“Loki –”

“Don’t let me be foolish, not with this, not with you.”

“Loki, stop.” Yen says, her smile fully blooming across her face. “Darling, yes. I can’t be without you.”

Loki’s smile mirrors Yen’s. “This is what freedom feels like.”

Yen looks to him quizzically.

“To no longer be caged within. To be able to say these things to you, after all this time.” Loki leans forward, resting his forehead against hers, “You have my heart. Darling, I’m yours.”

Their lips ghost over each other, breath mingling.

“Mine?” Yen hums, pecking his lips once, twice, quickly getting lost as his mouth moves against hers.

Warmth radiates through Yen’s body as she smiles into the kiss, her fingers threading through his obsidian locks, pulling him closer. If this what it results in embracing her seiðr, her darkness, then thank the Norns for letting her break fee.


End file.
